I truly believe that in life, you come across things at the exact moment when you need to see or hear them.
Today, I saw something which read:
"Your identity is based on a set of standards and a set of beliefs that you create for yourself. Those standards are what define you."
It stopped me cold and I sat there for the next 20 mins, thinking about what this meant in my life. What I was trying to figure out was how exactly did I define myself right now, and whatever it is, is this a correct reflection of how I want to be seen?
I began thinking about what type of standards I hold for myself and perhaps some were in desperate need of change. The passage said to look at all areas of your life as they are right now, and you will see the standard you have set for yourself. So there I sat, doing just that. If I'm being honest with myself, I'd have to admit that the picture I've painted of myself wasn't pretty. It was down right sad.
I looked at the current state of my body health, my financial situation, my relationships, etc. and decided almost immediately that my life was in desperate need of some new standards. The current "vibe" that I am giving off, is just not what I want to be portraying, both to myself or to the world.
I realized that sometimes the way people see you is a direct reflection of what you show them. So, if you're lying to yourself about who you are ( or worse, masking your true self, as I so famously do) then you've only got yourself to blame! If you can set standards and always be your authentic, raw self (even when it's hard, scary and otherwise not so "politically correct" to do so) then you've got a real shot at being happy.
Now, don't get me wrong. This isn't about caring what others think or pleasing them, oh hell no! This is only about YOU!
I think that if you set certain standards and values that define you, that you live by, you won't care so much about how the world sees you, anyway. At that point, when you're happy and proud of who you are, you honestly won't give a shit about anyone's opinion of you. You will never again allow someone else to own the definition of who you are. You will be strong enough to finally realize that this honor solely belongs to you!